If Geraldine has one regret about her career, it is that，
crosspiece of the partition in my room where I undressed alone
every evening, and I ceased to go out shooting with a gun lest I
should be tempted by so easy a way of ending my life. I did not
myself know what I wanted: I feared life, desired to escape from
it, yet still hoped something of it.
And all this befell me at a time when all around me I had what
is considered complete good fortune. I was not yet fifty; I had a
good wife who lived me and whom I loved, good children, and a large
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